How to Stop Thinking About Someone by Shifting Focus Onto Yourself

When your brain starts acting like it has its own mind, you lose control. Your thoughts are flooded with the memories of just one person, and you are overwhelmed and in need of help.

Learning how to stop thinking about someone constantly is, as you may already expect, not an easy process. That's why you need guidance in understanding when and what to do. Prolonging a negative feeling only generates dark thoughts. But how should you shut your feelings up and move on?

As impossible as it may seem right now, you shouldn't be discouraged. The loss means pain for everyone. However, you are in charge of your thoughts and feelings. That's why shifting the focus on yourself is the best thing you can do in this situation.

Read further to discover effective ways for changing your mood right away.

Start Your Journey to Recovery

You are stuck in endless thoughts about a certain someone, which generates anger, loss, nostalgia, resentment and a whole array of other negative feelings. So, your purpose is to free yourself from all of these emotions. Luckily, just as your mind plays tricks on you, you can play tricks on your mind by applying the following tips. The meaning of thinking about someone on a regular basis is not as profound as you may think.

1. Close all communication channels

One very wise step that you can take is closing off all communication channels between you and the person you are trying not to think of. Your trusted friend, social media, could become one of your worst enemies if you keep checking you-know-who's profile.

Regardless of the reason why you and the other person didn't work out, seeing what he or she is up to doesn't help. The same goes for friends in common. Maybe taking a break from your past acquaintances will push you in the arms of more supportive people.

2. Don't let things hold you back

Take a look around you. Are you surrounded by little things that remind you of that person? If the answer is yes, then you already know what to do. No one is saying to just throw everything away like it was never there. On the contrary, acting like nothing is wrong and not accepting the situation you're in is worse.

So, carefully put everything that used to connect you with the said individual in a box and store it away. Not having enough storage space is not an excuse. Give it to a friend, parent or even neighbor. Self-sabotage is often experienced when trying out different ways to stop thinking about someone constantly.

3. Treat your body with respect

You can apply this step on two levels for your healing process. Step one entails avoiding using alcohol or other replacements in order to forget. Aside from physically harming you, doing so will alter your perception. This means that you might think it's a good idea to contact the object of your affection after a glass of wine or two. Alcohol, similarly to other substances, will lower your inhibition levels, and it might lead to actions that you will regret.

The second step involves physical movement. In the process of finding out what it means when you can't get someone off your mind, you could forget how to properly take care of yourself. That's why it is crucial to feed your body properly and to exercise. Turning into a fitness guru overnight is out of the question. However, you could join Zumba or yoga classes, or even a gym. Use new acquaintances in your favor.

4. Use Your free time for development

The urge to keep checking on that special someone can turn into something productive. Use your free time to accrue knowledge in other domains. When was the last time you had fun by learning something new that interests you?

Discovering a new hobby would be a great outcome derived from an unpleasant situation. In addition, it could involve meeting new people, which is always great when trying to get over someone, be it an ex-boyfriend, crush, friend, relative and so on.

5. Hang out with people you like

Avoiding spending time alone reflecting on your deepest feelings is also advisable. Defeat the desire to lock yourself in the house and not talk to anyone. You might feel comfortable crying in bed and binging on TV series for a while. However, once you've come to terms and accepted the situation, it is time to get out and face the world again.

Possibly to your surprise, hanging out with friends or people dear to you will take your mind off the negativity. The same goes for helping others. Make yourself feel useful while occupying your mind with something else!

6. Organize time in your favor

A person who doesn't experience feelings of loss or obsession can still get depressed if he or she has no plans in the near future. Stay one step ahead of your possible mental breakdowns by keeping your schedule full.

Although you might not be able to concentrate at work because of your current obsession, you should still be encouraged to try. As soon as work hours are over, start doing something else that relaxes you or makes you laugh, even if it's silly.

7. Blame your brain chemicals

While playing the blame game is a definite no-no, you can consider the effect of your brain chemicals. This, however, only applies to people you've just met. Even a quick bonding moment can generate the production of dopamine. This is your brain producing a chemical that makes you feel good.

So, what does it mean when you can't get someone off your mind? It could just be dopamine, which will wear off if no further contact is made.

8. Identify and redefine the triggers

Triggers are those words, songs, images, and places that instantly remind you of a dear person. Instead of helplessly dealing with that unpleasant feeling in your stomach over and over again, you could redefine those triggers.

For example, think about other reasons why you like that song, or immediately indulge in something that makes you feel good. In time, this exercise will stop you from making the same associations.

9. Don't trust your mind

According to Tibetan wisdom, your mind is clouded when experiencing anger, worry, regret, as well as anxiety and stress. You might often find yourself knowing what needs to be done but not doing it. This is your mind playing tricks on you and making you believe certain things that are not really true (though they might feel very real).

10. Dilute your memories

When you can't control your thoughts, try to change them. In this way, you can remove the emotional hold you're experiencing. During this process, focus on your most absurd, funny and witty ideas rather than self-destructive ones that would make certain memories worse.

11. Put yourself first

The simple fact that you're trying to learn how to stop thinking about someone constantly is a step forward. Focus on making yourself feel good; pamper yourself without waiting for someone else to do it. Soon, you won't be able to stop thinking about all those things that have a positive effect on you.

Continue Your Journey to Happiness

Try out as many of the tricks above as possible in order to restore your mood and forget about everything that's no longer part of your life. Treat yourself with patience, and try not to force things. Attempt to look at this situation as a challenge, and overcome it by being the best version of yourself!

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