I Wholeheartedly Want to Be Single - My Way Is the Right Way

Single life is often seen as unfulfilling. They say life's joys are even better when shared with a loved one. However, are monogamy and commitment, for everybody? Feeling like you don't belong in a relationship might seem odd to some people, but for you, this is not the case.

Perhaps you blame it on your past relationships or even your childhood, but no matter how you look at it, the idea of being part of a couple is not appealing to you. It makes you uncomfortable.

We totally get why you'd like to choose a single lifestyle. That's why we will go over a few rational points with you, as well as help you do some soul searching to figure out exactly what you want. "I want to be single" might be your conclusion, so prepare for it.

Am I Selfish or Just Meant to Be Single?

When you are not in a relationship, you don't have any explaining to do. You can decide everything on your own without taking any other person into consideration. In addition, you can focus on your development on a totally different level compared to other people.

However, all this may sound selfish to you. Stop struggling against your nature if you find yourself identifying with the following points.

1. You can handle things on your own

Self-sufficiency is a quality of yours. You make enough money to pay your bills and even spoil yourself from time to time. Moreover, you don't find it difficult to call in for a plumber or fix your cabinet with a few nails and a hammer. Outsourcing is something you only do at work because of the impossible workload, not because you can't do it.

So, the need for someone to be there for you to lend a hand is non-existent. This is one reason that could lead you to the conclusion, "I want to be single".

2. Personal space is something you cherish

The idea of a certain someone being around you all the time scares you. When that happened in the past, you desperately wanted to get away. It's not that you refuse to be friends. You just like to be on your own and do your thing without having to explain yourself. You like to enjoy the company of others on your terms.

3. Compromise is not in your vocabulary

When it comes to relationships, communication and compromise are commonly used keywords. What compromise actually means is to give up on something you'd like to do and not do it for the sake of the person you love.

It also means that you must accept something you don't agree with just for the sake of the relationship - just because your partner does it for you as well. When the idea of compromise arises, do you ask yourself, "Do I want to be single again?" If you do, it might just be what you need.

4. Your spirit is bound to no one

The confines of family and society are not part of your world. Where you live, in that perfect little world you have created, you are free. You allow yourself to act depending on how you feel and let life take you where you are supposed to go.

Moreover, when you feel adventurous, the idea of just backpacking and hitchhiking for the weekend doesn't have to be approved by anyone. You enjoy this freedom. You don't need anyone to accompany you. That would only be a hassle.

5. Your past relationship success rate is low

The way your past relationships have developed might discourage you to start a new one because you fear failure. You might be afraid that you will get hurt or hurt someone. Also, you can't stop thinking about arguments, ups and downs, mood killers, and all those negative aspects of a romantic relationship.

Or, you might already be part of a couple and think "I want to be single, but I love my boyfriend." In this case, you'll have to decide who you love more: yourself or your boyfriend.

6. Your hobbies bring contempt in your life

Passion and contempt are two feelings not related to a romantic relationship. You have managed to get involved in wonderful activities that stimulate your body and mind. While other people were searching for their soulmate, you were searching for fun things to do on your own. How else can you discover who you really are if you don't invest in your interests and passions?

We're not saying that personal development is impossible when you have a partner. We are saying you lack the desire to find a partner because you are fine by yourself doing what you like.

7. The environment you grew up in wasn't encouraging

Besides the freedom and all the fun stuff you can do on your own, there might be hidden reasons why you wish to be single. How were things between your parents during your childhood? Did they often argue and shout at each other? Are your parents separated? Can you find a reason why the idea of family is not appealing to you?

Childhood trauma extends in your life as an adult, and it's important to know the difference. If your parents couldn't make their relationship work, this doesn't mean you can't. It is just a fear you have to overcome.

8. Monogamy is not for you

Monogamy has existed since the time of Ancient Greece and Rome. However, the reason for its occurrence is no longer applicable these days (or, at least, not on your personal level). There is no shame in wanting to experiment with multiple partners.

If you are only interested in the occasional physical contact with random people, then have it your way. If that's what you desire at the moment, there's nothing that should keep you from doing it. Just stay safe!

You Can Always Change Your Mind

Maybe you can easily say, "I want to be single" right now, but this doesn't mean you will always feel this way. So, don't stress about it too much. Just do what makes you happy, and should anyone steal your heart in the future, you will be able to reconsider the idea of being in a relationship.

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Words are powerful means by which we can express and explain the simplest notions, as well as the most complex human emotions. They become even more valuable when they represent a mix of multiple domains of expertise. And, in the hands of the right person, they are eye-openers meant to make our lives easier. As a writer, this is what I thrive on.