Important Things to Ask Your Partner Before Marriage

Getting married is the final step of every relationship, and it should never be taken lightly. Even if your dream is to finally get married, you should never rush it. You need to get your partner well before deciding to become his spouse. You need to know his view of family life, finances, raising children, and many other things. These are some of the things couples should talk about before marriage. Don't allow yourself to regret your decision because you were too impatient. Some other things you should know about your partner are his views on spirituality, religion, communicating problems, chores, expectations, etc. Here are some things to discuss before marriage divided into six different categories. If your partner is willing to talk with you openly, you're already on a good path. If you find certain problems or disagreements, you will solve them easily. Let's see these six categories of things to discuss before marriage.

General Issues

  • Why are we getting married, do we really love each other or there are some other reasons?

  • What are our plans as a couple, how are we going to maintain our work and family life?

  • Where do you see yourself in 10 to 20 years?

  • Do you like drinking alcohol and how often do you drink?

  • Do you think that family life will change you?

  • Do you plan to change your habits when we get married?

  • Are you aggressive, do you get mad easily, and have you ever hit someone?

  • Is loyalty something you consider a must?

  • Do you have a criminal record?

  • Do you use any illegal substances?

  • How much do you want to be immersed in our marriage?

  • Does getting married scare you?

  • Do you honestly believe that you're ready for marriage?

  • What do you think about yourself?

  • Would you like to have a pet?

Family of Origin

  • What was your childhood like?

  • What is your favorite/worst childhood memory?

  • Was your family affectionate or not?

  • What do you think about your family?

  • What is the most important thing you've learned from your family?

  • What do you think about my parents?

  • What would you do if some of your family members disliked me?

  • What do you like/dislike about your parents?

  • Do you have any mental disorders?

  • What would you do if someone from my family disliked you?

  • Are there any kinds of inheritable illnesses running in your family?

Time Management and Chores

  • Do you think both partners should do house chores evenly?

  • What would you do if you saw me struggle with house chores?

  • Would you take the kids to kindergarten as often as I would?

  • What do you think about a man's/woman's role when house chores and cooking are in question?

  • Will you clean the toilet?

  • How will we spend our free time?

  • How do you want to spend your days off?

  • Do you think we should do everything together?

  • Do you need alone time?

  • How much time will we spend with our friends and family?

  • Would you let me spend my free time however I want?

  • Would you let me devote some of my time to my hobbies?


  • Who will be responsible for a family budget?

  • Do you think we should have a family budget or keep our money as our own?

  • Can we openly talk about money? How do you feel about having a prenuptial agreement?

  • Are you good at saving money?

  • Do you think saving money is important?

  • Do you care about money?

  • What do you think about money?

  • Who is going to be responsible for paying bills on time?

  • Do you think that yearly vacation is a luxury or a necessity?

  • Do you have any debts?

  • Are you prone to lending or borrowing money?

  • What are our financial goals?

  • Would you like to purchase a home and how are we going to do it?

  • Will both of us know where important financial documents are located?

  • Will you trust me if we decide to have one family budget?

  • What is something you spend your money on the most?

  • Are you responsible when money is in question?


  • Do you want children?

  • How many children would you like to have?

  • How long should we be married before getting our first child?

  • What kind of parent do you want to be?

  • What if we make a child before marriage, would that be the reason for marriage?

  • What do you think is the best way of raising kids?

  • Do you want your kid to be a boy or a girl?

  • Do you care about your kid's gender?

  • What if our kid turns out to be bisexual or homosexual?

  • What do you think about adoption?

  • Do you have children already?

  • Do you think it's only a woman's job to take care of kids?

  • What if I don't want to have children?


  • Do you have trust or commitment issues?

  • Are you insecure?

  • What would you do if I criticized you when I should?

  • Are you prone to telling some insult out of rage?

  • Will you be willing to listen to my side of the story?

  • Are you jealous?

  • How will we male decisions together?

  • What if you don't agree with something that I think is important?

  • Do we handle conflict well?

  • What are our main differences?

  • Do you think we should adapt to each other's needs?

  • Can we both forgive?

  • Do you hold grudges?

  • What do you think about seeking professional help if we don't manage to solve certain problems?

  • Do you actually like quarreling?

  • Are you a nagger?


These are just some of the things couples should talk about before marriage. Remember that only people who are truly compatible and love each other should get married. Marriage is a beautiful thing and it is the crown of a relationship, but being married bears many responsibilities. You need to know if both of you are ready to change, share things and personal space, or have children. You also need to know much about your partner's past and overall mental and physical health.

Ana Djurovic
319616 Article 104

Hello, my name is Ana Djurovic, and I am a writer interested in various kinds of fields, such as beauty, fitness, art and traveling. I am very curious and always in need to expand my knowledge. I enjoy writing because it's something I can fully invest myself in. I think sharing our stories and experiences is what brings us together.