You may not want it to happen, but it does; sometimes, you are simply too sensitive in your relationship. The problem is that the more sensitive you are, the higher the chances of getting hurt. Plus, if your sensitivity comes out negatively, you might make your significant other become frustrated and develop negative feelings as well. This is why you need to learn how to stop being highly sensitive in a relationship. For the sake of your relationship (and let's face it, your sanity), you need to learn how to control your emotions so that both of you can be happy.
Have an Inner Talk
Who said that talking to yourself is bad? After all, we all have quite a number of emotions bottled up inside. The more we keep them bottled up, the likelier it will be that everything will just blow up at the most inappropriate moment.
This is why expressing those thoughts to yourself might help you release the pressure, and the most efficient way to do so would be through a diary. This way, only you would "hear" your thoughts and you will be able to release some of that anxiety you're bottling up.
Find Out Your Trigger
In order to feel less sensitive in a relationship, you first need to think about what exactly makes you tick. The journal we talked about before might be able to help you. You might want to read it through and figure out what makes you so sensitive.
Did you feel highly sensitive when someone pointed out one of your mistakes? Or maybe you got triggered by the fact that your partner said you are ignorant in regard to a certain matter. You need to determine what bothers you the most, and then move forward to fix that issue.
Be More Direct
Sometimes, our sensitivity is caused by the fact that we never say what's on our mind and that we never communicate what bothers us to our partners. In the end, everything piles up, and when we do eventually say it, we do it in the form of an overly-sensitive bomb that has just exploded.
For this reason, if you are asking yourself, "Am I overly sensitive in my relationship?" think about how often you communicate your thoughts directly. Sometimes, by simply asking the question or addressing the doubt directly, you will be able to realize that your hypersensitivity had no actual basis.
Set Some Alone Time for Yourself
Sensitive people tend to have a need for both meaningful connections and downtime. This is why you need to ensure that you find the perfect balance between spending quality time with your significant other and enjoying alone time.
This can be quite challenging in itself, but by failing to do so, you will end up over-stimulating yourself. This can cause you to be quite anxious, irritable, angry, and overall close to a burnout. By enjoying some regular downtime (after work or once every week), indulging in some self-care or small pleasures, you should be able to keep your sensitivity under control.
Receive Things With Passion
A great way of being less sensitive in a relationship is to receive everything with passion. Instead of avoiding passion altogether, you need to dive into the feeling. The more you focus on the passion, the less you should be stressing out over what triggers you in a relationship.
Plus, considering that sensitive people tend to give rather than receive, a good way of dealing with sensitivity is to learn how to receive instead. This will allow you to create a meaningful connection with your partner, one that is focused on passionate giving and receiving.
Limit Your Overthinking
We know this is easier said than done, but if you want to stop being sensitive, you first need to limit your overthinking. Think about your usual behavior. Do you tend to overthink comments or situations? Obsess over the slightest remark? Do you make up entire scenarios in your head simply because of something a particular person said?
To prevent the situation from going sideways, you need to stop trying to turn a molehill into a mountain. Doing so will only cause you to be less productive and calm. Indeed, it's a good idea to reflect on what you did in the past to make sure you do better in the future, but the last thing you want to do is to turn that reflection into an obsession. If you find yourself saying "my boyfriend thinks I'm too emotional," then you might want to see where your train of thoughts seems to be going out of control.
Think Before Reacting
Overly-sensitive people tend to jump to conclusions and react defensively, but before you allow your reactions to get the better out of you, you might want to mentally stop yourself and think before you do or say something. Whenever you assume something about the intentions of a particular person, think about it this way: are you maybe negatively filtering everything, without the actual proof to support your belief?
For example, let's say that your boyfriend doesn't immediately reply to your text regarding a date this weekend. Immediately your emotions start going rampant, and you believe he's too busy with someone else to spend time with you, resulting in the relationship growing cold and ultimately breaking up. Voilà, you just made the situation worse for no reason, which is why "think before you act" should become your mantra.
Set Some Emotional Boundaries
Setting clear emotional boundaries is a very important step in your journey to stop being overly sensitive. These boundaries involve separating your feelings from the other person's feelings, pretty much allowing yourself to become your own person. Look deep into your feelings to determine when your boundaries are being crossed.
Not only will you not be pushing your feelings onto your partner, violating their emotional privacy, but you also won't allow their feelings to control your own. This way, your self-esteem will improve and you won't feel so overly sensitive anymore.
Ask for Professional Help
Despite our best efforts, sometimes we might be in need of some professional help. We all want to avoid expert help for fear of being labeled, but sometimes, that can actually be life-changing. This is mostly because they are already prepared to handle situations like these. A professional will help you identify your triggers and keep your emotions under control. They will help you see the problem from a different perspective, preventing you from overreacting when your mind goes into overdrive.
Final Thoughts
There's nothing wrong with having a sensitive soul. It only becomes a problem when it's too sensitive. For this reason, whenever you feel like your emotions are going haywire, you might want to step back and give it some deep thought. Hopefully, our tips on how to stop being sensitive in a relationship will prove helpful to you.